All I really want is some peace man

I don’t even know how to describe how my last couple of weeks has been. Calling them exhausting and challenging would be an understatement. Sometimes when a person is challenged this often I think it’s fair to say that a burn out is inevitable. I know that the ministry would probably not like me to talk about the situation that I am in so publicly so I will just say that I have had a dispute over another colleague at my school and now I am awaiting results of this conflict. Let me just say, it is not wise to threaten someone who is on a foreign mission in your country. Don’t do it. Ever.

Sometimes I don’t understand people. Maybe I don’t need to understand this particular person. For my own peace of mind I think I need to let people who are in charge handle it and try not to worry so much. I have been trying to let go of things that I have no control over and trying to handle things that I do have control over.

I’m honestly getting sick and tired of some of the disrespect that goes on from some of the learners here. Why did I travel half way across the world to teach you if half your class is going to try and skip coming to my class? It is rude…and I’m done. I don’t want to keep repeating myself during the week to multiple classes. It is rude and disrespectful to not come to a teacher’s class. There is no excuse for it. I am less inclined to want to help you if you don’t bother to show up.

I am the only class that the learners can possibly skip because it’s the only one they have to walk to. I am also not the only teacher that is disrespected. I don’t know what it is with these upper grades but they have a tude problem that needs some fixing. This is exactly why I have my certification in elementary school and why I do not choose to work with middle or high school. I understand that they are still young and challenging authority, but I don’t want to be the target of it.

I think I haven’t written a post since the one about my daily life because I knew I wasn’t happy right now. I try very hard to keep positive with whatever is happening and I don’t want people to take what I’m saying the wrong way. I am still grateful that I am here but I think that every person has a limit as to what they can take and I’ve reached mine for the time being. What I need is a vacation.

And guess what? I have two more days of teaching this week and then Wednesday after school I’m going for the long weekend. I am travelling with some of the other volunteers back down to the south of Namibia to go to Swokopmund. This is the best thing for me right now. Swokop is the area on the coast where the ocean is. If you know me you know that the beach and the ocean is my “happy place”. I think the long weekend near my happy place will put me back into balance and give me some perspective. I don’t know what it is about staring out into the ocean, but it makes a person humble and remember how large this world is.

I would also love to post pictures for this blog but the internet connection is terrible and I am unable to do so at this time. So I am sorry you'll just have to imagine for now!

Peace and Love,
Chels